Day 8

She came for breakfast this morning. I had been dreading seeing her, and was indeed very uncomfortable. I didn’t know what to say or how to act. I took my seat at the table and sat mutely, eyes downcast as she laid out the food.

“Why so glum?” she asked.

“I’m ashamed,” I answered.

“Ashamed of what?”

“I don’t know…” I stammered, struggling to sort out what I felt, “ashamed that I showed no self control. No dignity.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she chirped brightly. “No one can resist me. Do you think I doubted that you would jerk off to me eventually?”

This made me grimace. “But to do it in front of you… while you watched…”

“I set that little trap for you, silly pet,” she explained, her tone still light. “You responded just as you were meant to. I thought it would be a nice moment for us to share… and it was.”

“Was it a trick?” I asked, grasping at straws. “Did you hypnotize me into doing it?”

She didn’t dignify this with an answer, but just looked crossly at me as if to warn me not to be an idiot. I withered and glanced downward, abashed. For a few minutes we ate silently.

“I give up,” I said.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“I surrender. I want you. I can’t help it. I want to touch you so desperately. To hold you. To kiss you. To make love to you. Like you said, I can’t resist you. You don’t have to keep me prisoner any more, I’ve been seduced.”

She laughed. “Nice try, pet. Thanks for playing, but no cigar. This hasn’t been an elaborate ploy to get you to want me. If that was my object, believe me there was no need to build an extra bathroom in my house to achieve it.”

Despite the awkwardness and absurd circumstances of the moment, I couldn’t help but laugh. “So what now?” I asked. “Would it help if I begged?”

“Beg for what? To be released?”

“Well… no… that is… yes… but not before I can be with you.”

“You’re with me now.”

This made me groan in frustration. “Please…” I began, reaching out toward her with my hand. It stopped in mid air, trembling, restrained by her post-hypnotic conditioning.

She gestured with her open palm for me to relax, and I let my hand drop. When I had complied she laid her open hand gently on my cheek. The feel of her touch calmed me. “I’ll tell you what, pet,” she said in a soothing tone. “I’ll set you a new task. Do it and I will let you choose your reward.”

“What task?” I asked eagerly.

“First there are conditions,” she warned. “I will give you any reward you desire, but know this…if you choose the right reward, and only if you do, I will give you your memories back and let you go.”

“How will I know what the right reward is?”

“Let me worry about that,” she responded. “You should just be sure to take your time, think carefully, and ask only for what you really want.”

“Okay,” I agreed. “What is the task?”

“Today is Friday,” she said, thinking aloud, “If you can refrain from masturbating until our breakfast meeting next Wednesday, I will give you whatever you desire.”

I didn’t understand why she would charge me with this, but that only makes it exactly like everything else I have experienced since waking in this cell. I nodded to indicate that I accepted the challenge. The rest of the breakfast was uneventful. We chatted about stories from the previous day’s newspapers.

After she left I spent the day in a fog. I’m still confused about what happened yesterday, but some of the sick edge of shame and guilt has come off of the experience. I read and watched television for the rest of the day, but my mind was only ever half focused on what I was doing. Half was still mulling over the discussion over breakfast and the events of yesterday.

Still no mention of me on the local news. Why is that?

Day 9

Breakfast was relaxed today. Neither of us brought up the challenge she had laid down yesterday. The sexual tension between us was still very palpable, but I think that must be the case for virtually everyone with whom Goddess Marquesa interacts. She is the kind of person who can’t help but arouse intense attraction in others, and enjoy doing so.

That dimension aside, however, our interaction was very casual. Someone watching us talk might have mistaken us for two old friends rather than jailer and prisoner. We spoke about the news, and movies that she recommended I try to watch on TV, and anecdotes from her life and travels. I frequently found myself forgetting the strange circumstances of our situation. My blank memory leaves me no context to tell for sure, but I would bet good money that she is among the most charming people I have ever met.

My loneliness when she had left was acute. I didn’t realize how difficult the task she had set for me was until she had departed after breakfast today. Almost as soon as she left, I felt the urge to fantasize about her and masturbate.

I spent the whole day distracted. I read more of Venus in Furs, but could not give it my sustained attention. My thoughts kept returning to her. Wishing for her voice, her image.

As I tried to read, my eyes kept going back to the TV, thinking of the channel that had broadcast from her living room. Was it working again? Could I see her once more? Curiosity and yearning warred with fear. The prospect of seeing her was delightful, the danger of what I might be tempted to do once I laid eyes on her, unsettling.

Finally, I gave in, and turned the set on. The channel was broadcasting again. Goddess Marquesa was seated on a couch in her living room, reading a magazine. The sight of her immediately calmed and focused me. I was thrilled, but didn’t feel the same uncontrollable urge rising in me that had gripped me two days before. “Great,” I thought, “this will be easy. As long as I can enjoy looking at her, I’ll cruise to the finish line.”

I shouted and waved, thinking to attract her attention. She didn’t respond- I assumed she must have turned off the feed on her end. Giving up establishing contact, I settled in to feast on the sight of her to my heart’s content.

I don’t know how long I watched her- an hour, maybe more. The pleasure was gently sweet, like basking in the sunshine on a warm spring day. But then there was a sound- chimes playing a line of music. I think it must be a song I knew, but I can’t remember the name or artist, only some lyrics- “she’s got it… oh, baby she’s got it.”  It must have been the front door bell, because Goddess Marquesa rose and walked off camera. When she returned she was followed by a man in a blue suit. Resuming her seat on the couch, she addressed the man in an imperious tone.

“You know what I want, professor,” was all she said.

The man took off all of his clothes with the practiced motions of someone following a well-worn routine. When he was naked, his clothes piled neatly to one side, he stood facing Goddess Marquesa, eyes downcast, hands at his side. Without his shirt collar to hide it, I could see a studded leather collar around his neck. He seemed to be waiting expectantly.

“Do you want to earn a reward?” the Goddess asked, after making the man wait a few moments.

“Yes, Goddess,” the man answered meekly.

“Show me what a good puppy you are,” Goddess Marquesa declared.

At this command the man fell to all fours and began scurrying on the carpet like a frisky dog.

“Now wag your tail!”

Again the man complied, shaking his rump back and forth comically. For the next twenty minutes the man, who must have been in his late thirties or early forties, obeyed every command the Goddess uttered as if his life depended on it. He sat. He fetched. He barked. He rolled over. He sniffed the Goddess’s feet. He begged, and then gobbled up doggie treats that she threw on the floor for him.

I watched, appalled and fascinated all at once. I couldn’t believe that a grown man would act this way, but a creeping feeling of unease overcame me. Looking down, I understood… my cock was rock hard. I was as turned on by this scene as the stupid schmuck scrambling around on the floor. What did that make me?

Finally, Goddess Marquesa called the circus to a halt. “All right puppy, come up for your reward,” she ordered, patting the spot on the couch next to where she sat. The man, still playing canine, jumped up and settled upon the couch on all fours, his head facing away from Goddess Marquesa and his ass held high. The Goddess stood up and turned to face the man-dog’s offered ass. Pulling back, she brought her hand across the man’s buttocks with a resounding “smack!”

The pain must have been intense. The man flinched and whimpered, but he did not pull away.

“What do you say, puppy?” Goddess Marquesa asked.

“Thank you, Goddess!”

“Do you want another?”

“Yes, please!”

Smack!

My jaw dropped in amazement. This was the man’s reward! The beating went on. It was grotesque to watch, but enthralling too. With each blow the man’s pain became more unbearable, but he endured in order to have a moment of contact with the Goddess. The graceful violence seemed to make her even more beautiful. No, she was as beautiful as she ever was, but the hard brilliance of her sexiness was revealed, like when a gemstone is held up to a bright light.

At some point in the spectacle, I don’t know when, my hand closed involuntarily around the shaft of my cock and began to stroke. All of my shame and regret of the day before returned. Was this what I had been all along, even before Goddess Marquesa stole my memory- a degenerate Peeping Tom? But the need was so great, the desire she inspired so implacable, I could not resist. It was only when I remembered the Goddess’s words of yesterday, and thought of the reward that I risked forfeiting, that I was able to force myself to stop, and released my shaft. I stood trembling, at war with myself, still unable to tear my eyes away from the screen.

The pain had become so great for the man that he had collapsed flat against the back of the couch and clenched a pillow in his teeth to muffle his screams. Still, he left his ass exposed, too addicted to the Goddess’s blows to ask her to stop. Red welts covered his buttocks.

“You’ve had enough,” the Goddess declared. “Come thank me for your reward.”

The man slid off of the couch and crawled over to the Goddess, bending down to plant passionate kisses on her feet. “Thank you…thank you, Goddess…” he murmured between kisses.

Goddess Marquesa let the man worship her for a few moments and then turned and walked toward the camera, leaving her puppy forgotten in a heap. She approached so close that her face and shoulders filled my screen. Seeming to look into my eyes, she winked and blew a kiss. “You were a naughty boy,” she said, “we agreed that you were to keep your hands off that cock.” After she said this, one shoulder rose as she lifted her hand, and the screen went black.

What did she mean? Did I fail her challenge? Lights out is about to happen, but I don’t know if I will be able to sleep.